I just feel like talking about with someone. I’m 16F if it matters.
How do you feel about it?
At first it was shock, now it’s just disappointment. At the same time I’m relieved he’s not going to prison, he’s a single dad & I really love him. Couldn’t imagine being apart from him like that. Honestly the worst part at the moment is the community gossip.
That’s a lot for a young person to have to process… Do you have a therapist who can help you with that?
I’m not seeing one at the moment. Honestly I’ve never been to a therapist before. For some reason it hasn’t ever even crossed my mind. I might in the future.
It’s definitely worth it… Even if you just went to your schools guidance counselor they might be able to help you get the ball rolling finding one
As a single dad to four kids, I think I can understand your disappointment. My daughter was 12 when her mother died and even if I had committed a crime I think she would have felt the same as you. Dada are also only human.
True
What did your old man do?
“Managed” some women’s careers. Aka pimping.
When he’s got a daughter and should really know better, gross. I’m sorry
Thank you
Well, that doesn’t sound nice. Had you been exposed to that part of his life, or are you that close with your Dad? I should think part of the danger of being around somebody like that is that they could potentially bring you into that, which may not be so great for women involved with that. That he has a suspended sentence makes it sound like he’s still out free, he just has to keep to whatever conditions they set for him, so I guess he still has a chance to avoid jail.
Part of me thinks that Prostitution should be legalized (though heavily regulated), but there’s instances like this where I’m not so sure women wouldn’t just be taken advantage of (thus the need for heavy regulation). It’s been an ongoing trade for 1000’s of years, women shouldn’t be punished for providing something that men clearly value. Maybe it should be punishable to be a pimp or a madam, but the women themselves shouldn’t be punished. But on the other hand, is exploitation, even self-imposed exploitation due to economic hardships from a cruel and unjust system ever really justified? I say that women should have a choice in the matter, but do they really have a choice?
We’re very close, but I never knew about this before it came out. Yeah, he’s not going to jail, he just has to fulfill certain conditions such as don’t commit any crimes during this period, do community service… due to the fact that the women he “managed” were consenting, were of age, were never forced to do anything against their will or abused, he got the most lenient sentence possible. He got into an argument with one of the women about the %, she told him you either change it or I report you, he said he’s not taking orders, then well… she reported him (she also got fined for prostitution due to it). That’s how the investigation started.
No idea about the particulars of the business or anything about your Dad, but sounds like he got caught because maybe he wasn’t ruthless or abusive, which I guess is a good thing in his favor (?). I could easily see that woman’s argument turning out much worse for her had your Dad been a different person and resorted to other negotiation methods. Did he just provide protection services or did he sort of manage the transactions from start to finish, almost like a temp agency… just for prostitutes? I’m always curious about how black market businesses operate outside of “normal” business environments.
Yeah. Dad just told her he’s not changing %, that’s not negotiable, they agreed to a number and that’s it, if she doesn’t find it ok she’s free to find another “manager”; but he won’t be blackmailed or commanded, so if she wants to report him she can go ahead. From what I know, he not only provided protection, but also managed online profiles (advertising, marketing), procured clients himself, arranged locations & transport, texted with prospective clients in the name of the women if they were unavailable / not wanted to talk, made sure the locations (rented apartments) were always supplied with the necessary products, etc. Kind of like an entertainment manager.
In that context, that paints a very different picture of your Dad than what I read originally. Apart from general “issues” with prostitution as a business, I’m not sure I could say your Dad was really doing anything “wrong”, apart from facilitating an illegal business, but from what you’re describing, he seemed to do it in a relatively fair way (assuming whatever %'s they were operating under wasn’t exploitative, but I don’t even know what the cut-off is). It’s kind of a morally ambiguous crime based on what you’ve written (also assuming no trafficking or coercion or anything like).
Had it been my Dad, I don’t know that it’d be the sort of thing I’d disown him over, but I’m a guy with lenient views of prostitution anyways, so you may feel quite differently about it. Hopefully he’s able to stay out of trouble and transition to more legal ventures, I know how hard it can be for people to get out of the legal system once you start getting caught up with all sorts of restrictive conditions and such. Oftentimes it seems like the legal system is design to keep people spiraling around the drain more than it is trying to help people get better.
The crazy part is that he already has (and had) a successful legal venture (business)! He did all of this as a side quest and because he found the work fun; not because he needed money. Which is why none of the women were forced to work with him, because unlike most pimps, he wasn’t depended on the money made from the women. This is why the woman who reported him got told by him to find another man or go solo if she’s dissatisfied; most pimps would never let you just quit like that.
Do you view him differently now that you know this stuff about him? How, if at all, do you think your relationship might change?
Honestly, I always knew he was a bit of a daredevil / cocky person. Was this revelation shocking? Yes. Was it super surprising? Not really. If anything this has just solidified what I already viewed him as in my mind. Proved to me he’s really not a rational person; I mean who tf starts pimping for the “thrill” of the business? Also his own cockiness took him down in the end, by telling the woman who reported him he’s not taking orders / demands. Our relationship hasn’t changed much and I don’t think it will, but from now on I’ll definitely keep a close eye on him.
Does your dad want to go out of this clean, or does he still lean towards crime?
Definitely clean. He didn’t even need the money. He runs a business which makes more than enough. He did it as a “fun side gig” and because he found it “exciting”… you’d think at 35 he’d know better.
