i’m so sorry you have felt this way before. it really feels like im going insane sometimes. this morning i took a 1 hour ride up to the mountains and just stared down a canyon cliff and pondering. i just feel so trapped.

holy shit… I do this too. for a while I fought it off, but I think that’s making it hit harder. I say this to myself at work a LOT and ive done it talking to friends and had to apologize. I’m super here for you if you need to say anything. sending internet hugz.

;)

Sorry to hear. Best wishes, friend.

Thanks so much for recommending both books. I will be sure to give both a read soon.

Interesting point of view. Honestly I guess I am kinda broken in that regard, I miss the constant fixations a lot, I feel so bored and helpless when I have nothin’ to focus on. it does sound to me like your hope is ultimately to control that, in which case I wish you the absolute best.