This is not my personal opinion, I know Gen Z men who voted for Harris. But the voter demographics really speak for themselves, and maybe now people will look at the radicalization of young men as a serious (but solvable) issue.

  • Intergalactic@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    I’m a gen z male, raised in a far right Republican household. I’m a social democrat. I am progressive.

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      Unironically, congrats on breaking free of the brainwashing. I grew up in an insanely red rural area and a very conservative religious family, unlearning all that shit has been a decades long process (and still continues).

    • atocci@lemmy.world
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      Same man. It was wild when middle school rolled around and I finally gained awareness of the world beyond myself and learned what the Republicans actually were and wanted. A friend who knew more about politics than me explained some stuff, and suddenly I had to question why my family was against progressive beliefs.

    • Xanthrax@lemmy.world
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      Same. I live on a ranch in a deeply red area. Voted Kamala. I’m also happy to say my conservative parents are ex-republicans.

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      Mostly the same, i was raised to be a worthless red neck. I’m not. The issue with using our experiences is that we are people, we have an inner world and are capable of free thought. Trump’s followers aren’t.

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      I’m also a Gen Z male, raised in an evangelical household at a Christian school that supported Christian nationalism, and was supposed to be a strong conservative Christian but ended up turning into an atheist socialist instead. It’s kind of funny to read that Gen Z is going radical right when for me it was the opposite.

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      Can you please tell your entire generation to get it together worldwide? That’d be great, thanks.

      Leaving this here just in case: /s

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    There is a lot to be said here. I’ll use my own experience as an example.

    I’m a millennial male who had a terrible time as a young adult through my mid 30s. I grew up in a fairly religious/conservative area of the US, and I didn’t have the ability to even start questioning that before my college years because literally everyone I knew was either a vocal supporter of or tacitly accepted that cultural status quo. Mental health issues were either not discussed or not recognized in any serious fashion. It wasn’t until my late 20s that I finally understood that I had severe depression and anxiety and sought help, despite suffering from it since my early teenage years.

    Socially, I never felt like I was cool enough or good enough. I didn’t understand women, and the endless series of rejections and confusing encounters only served to erode my low self confidence further. I had no idea what a healthy relationship looked like because my parents were just going through the motions at that point, and the relationships I saw in TV shows and movies were incredibly shallow. The few people I considered friends did not support me in any positive way. I eventually kicked them to the curb, preferring solitude to being the butt of their jokes.

    I was a prime target for recruitment for the alt-right: depressed, alone, disaffected, and ready to lash out. The only thing that kept me from going in that direction was a keen sense that the rhetoric was bullshit and its leaders only cared to take advantage of the rank-and-file to accumulate money and power. Many people I knew were not so perceptive and became victims of that movement.

    My only saving grace was that I had a decent job with healthcare benefits, which allowed me to get the therapy I needed to overcome these challenges. Again, most people I knew did not have such resources. Nearly a decade later, I am now a family man with a wife and child. I am far happier than I have been at any other point in my life. Despite that, there is still plenty I don’t understand. I don’t have a good grasp of what positive masculinity looks like. I cannot point to anyone who has served as a good, male role-model in my life. I still don’t have any close male friends with whom I can share my feelings and challenges.

    However, I do understand how easily young men can be swayed to far-right crusades. Social media warped my view of reality, and it’s far worse now than it was 10-15 years ago. Moreover, there is no alternative to far-right echo chambers for young men to commiserate and get help. Those spaces simply do not exist on the left. If you dare to complain or vent, you will immediately be told your problems don’t matter and called a misogynist. I can readily call multiple conversations I had with liberals and feminists who rejected my problems, even being told that I was “living life on easy mode” because I was a man.

    For all the women who are reading this, I get it. As a man, I don’t have to worry about the government meddling in my bodily autonomy. For the most part, I don’t have to worry about walking alone at night or being accosted or raped. I don’t have to worry about being taking seriously at my job or being passed over for promotions because of my gender. However, none of that negates the challenges that young men are facing. Their gender does not save them from broken homes, abuse, mental health issues, a bad job market, degrading standards of living, student debt, double-standards, confusing and contradictory narratives surrounding dating and relationships, etc. Yes, privileged men with no right to complain do exist, but they are an extreme minority. The vast majority of young men are in a bad place, and the only people reaching out to help have ulterior motives. If you want things to change, try having some empathy. Maybe you will get empathy for your problems in return.

    • bestboyfriendintheworld@sh.itjust.works
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      This. Men are more often victims of violent crime, homelessness, mental illness, suicides, do worse in school, incarceration, die in wars, work dangerous jobs. Classic male institutions, structures, and spaces don’t exist anymore like they used to.

      Add to that that men showing emotions is still seen as weakness.

      These issues aren’t addressed or even mentioned.

      • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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        Men are more often victims of violent crime, homelessness, mental illness, suicides, do worse in school, incarceration, die in wars, work dangerous jobs.

        The victims of other men. That’s the joke of it all. And the folks screaming loudest about being victimized are inevitably the ones quickest and most eager to take their own pound of flesh at the first opportunity.

        Add to that that men showing emotions is still seen as weakness.

        Primarily among other men. This isn’t a gendered issue nearly so much as it is a socio-economic hierarchy. The “excess males” problem is what’s driving the violence, the poverty, and the declining health. Young men are pressed into the social hierarchy by their elders, often from an extremely young age, through physical, emotional, and sexual violence. They climb the social ladder by proving their tolerance for abuse by those above, while exhibiting a sufficient capacity for sadism on those below. Anyone who cannot endure the abuse and find their own cohort to abuse in turn becomes the social excrement that the system exudes.

        This is literally “The Patriarchy” that feminists rant about and seek to abolish. But efforts to abolish the system invoke its most violent tendencies. The result is a youth population that is selected for the most sniveling and cruel to lead it into the next generation.

        • CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works
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          This entire comment is exactly the kind of lack of empathy that the gentleman was talking about.

          Primarily among other men.

          The worst I ever got for showing emotions in front of other men was being called sensitive. Women on the other hand dismissed me with fury, insulting my manhood and even hitting me.

          They climb the social ladder by proving their tolerance for abuse by those above, while exhibiting a sufficient capacity for sadism on those below.

          Where did you learn this fucking nonsense, gender studies?

          The Patriarchy

          Interesting name for it given how many men will tell you it is women upholding men’s gender roles. Men are still expected to pay for dates, to be able to support families, to have a home and a car before they’re even worth attempting to date…

        • lobut@lemmy.ca
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          When Terry Crews came out about his sexual assault. So many men publicly derided him. I felt so bad for Terry.

          For the record, fifty cent, Vlad from VladTV, DL Hughley were those that made fun of Terry and some even insinuated he was possibly gay.

        • Queen HawlSera@lemm.ee
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          And if Feminists could differentiate between a homeless man down on his luck and a bigoted billionaire asshole, “The Patriarchy” would actually get fought, but they both have dicks and are therefore identical.

        • PixelProf@lemmy.ca
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          I agree that much of the problem is men on men and this patriarchy - men who do not want to uphold patriarchal values can often be ostracized and demonized by those who do - but I believe OP was specifically noting that then those men who get abused and ostracized cannot speak out of seek help because many people will simply snap back at them saying that they are part of the problem and resources need to be given elsewhere. They cannot endure the abuse, and their own cohort becomes abusive, and the only way to avoid the abuse from all sides (in their view) becomes joining the “social excrement” they wanted to escape in the first place.

          Angry screams tend to mask sad and lonely tears. Hatred does not end hatred; hatred ends through non-hate alone. Non-hate is not inaction, though. If we do not look at them, and ourself, with empathy and kindness and understanding and patience, they will continue living in a world devoid of and therefore ignorant to empathy and kindness and understanding and patience.

          • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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            those men who get abused and ostracized cannot speak out of seek help because many people will simply snap back at them

            The people they’re surrounded with who will snap back are the folks higher up the chain. Parents and older siblings, bosses and sports coaches, bullies at school, etc. The people you see “snap back” on Redpill discords are TikTok influencers none of these men knew existed a day ago.

            the only way to avoid the abuse from all sides (in their view) becomes joining the “social excrement” they wanted to escape in the first place.

            From the inside, you’re told everyone on the outside is out to get you. Anyone who is nice must be a predator. Anyone who is apathetic must be a bigot. Meanwhile, the people on the inside are your friends. They only want to make you stronger and tougher. The hazing, the abuse, and the exploitation are for your own benefit.

            Only be leaving the insulated Redpilled world do you realize most people simply aren’t invested in the cultish behavior and bullshit ideology.

            • PixelProf@lemmy.ca
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              Oh absolutely, I’m pretty sure I’m on the same page with this. I only pose that to someone who believes they’ve found people who respect them, and particularly those who have felt for a long time that their voice didn’t matter, it is counterproductive to approach them and their group with outward hostility.

              Telling them the people who took them in and listened to them are vile, abusive, disgusting people and are exactly the problem they say everyone says you are, is just reinforcing of their views.

              Consider the comment originally replied to; paraphrase because mobile is hard, “those loudest about being victimized are the most eager to take their pound of flesh”. This can easily sound like:

              1. (Man) I’ve been victimized and nobody lets me voice this except for this gang/cult/militia. Cult says they should be allowed to “get support” and they know the way (it’s bad).
              2. (Outsider) Claiming to be a victim usually means you are a terrible person.
              3. (Man) So according to outsiders, if I seek help, I’m a bad person. According to my (cult etc) if I tell them, they will offer a form of support. I can stay with these people and get something of support, or I can leave them, be ostracized, and any attempts to voice my feelings will lead me to being labeled someone eager to take a pound of flesh.

              They need to be shown that those on the outside understand them and are better people than those who took them in. They are with people whose form of empathy and respect is so distorted and toxic, but it’s the only model of that experience they know.

              Your comment, upon my read, felt like anyone in that position would feel justified in their gang telling them that everyone on the outside is out to get them. If they already think everyone else is a predator, what is attacking their friends, their family, and their opinions, going to do?

              They will only leave when they know they will arrive somewhere with the respect they craved without those toxic feelings they repressed during their time with a hateful group.

              So I guess it’s less about the content of the comment, more of the way it represented the ideas, the timing, and the perceived intention.

              • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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                Telling them the people who took them in and listened to them are vile, abusive, disgusting people

                This isn’t a matter of telling anyone, this is a matter of people in abusive systems realizing it on their own. You can pop over to the ex-Mormon or ex-Scientology communities and find these folks in droves. Its not random anons asserting the corrupt nature of these relationships but the folks who escaped them.

                “those loudest about being victimized are the most eager to take their pound of flesh”

                The loudest folks are the social media influencers. You’ll regularly hear your Tim Pools and your Jordan Petersons, your James Dobsons and your Elon Musks, rant about how men are victimized by femininity, while profiting off the insecure and insulated men who have been roped into their carny acts.

                They need to be shown that those on the outside understand them and are better people

                The folks that profit off the patriarchy are the least willing (or, even, able) to convey an outsider understanding. They only persist by rehashing age old tropes of toxic masculinity.

                They will only leave when they know they will arrive somewhere with the respect

                They can only find respect when they leave. If they’re trapped in a bubble of delusion, they’re just going to get a shadow-play of Woke Liberal Virgins being mean-spirited losers and Based Trad Chads being triumphant paragons of virtue.

        • ObliviousEnlightenment@lemmy.world
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          Why is this downvoted, but not the comments its responding to; wtf? But yeah, you could not be more right on the patriarchy bit. All the things being cited here are things actual feminists have known for a century. What men need, beyond positive role models, is a rebranded classical feminism. The reason you cant just call it feminism is kinda the problem. The term has been associated with misandrists, who feminist advocates tolerate way more they tactically should. Because us vs them narratives are very appealing

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            Feminist in general is the wrong word because it inherently sounds like placing women first, rather than treating men and women equally

            I would also say that everyone regardless of gender is treated pretty shittily at the moment

            • ObliviousEnlightenment@lemmy.world
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              I’m using the term because it…is the word for that philosophy. I’m not exactly campaigning here

              You are right about that though. Men and women both get shitty treatments, the funny thing is they’re almost polar opposite experiences and both manage to suck monkey farts

    • bdjegifjdvw@lemmy.world
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      As a Gen Z man who statistically should have fallen down the incel and alt-right pipeline but didn’t, this echos exactly what I see in my generation. We don’t have positive examples of Masculinity, and the left just yells at us that we’re trash, when we struggle with things and most don’t have many (or any) good friends to lean on. So of course they go to the alt right.

      • omgarm@feddit.nl
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        and the left just yells at us that we’re trash

        I’m a millenial and I never got this. There must be a split somewhere when people fell into different echo chambers or algorhythms. Like 7 years go I used to frequent reddit subs like MGTOW and pussypassdenied, looking for something to connect to because of clinical single-ness. These were the only spaces I would find comments like that. On my other, left wing, socialist Internet spaces this wasn’t present. That is why those pro-men/anti-women subs never connected to me. The work on yourself, improve yourself and keep reading was great, but the insane amount of hatred and religion pushing was crazy.

        Yet it feels like men in my situation these days don’t have alternatives. It’s sad when Andrew Tate is considered masculine. Terry Crews or Keanu Reeves are much better. Sure they’re not podcasters, but they give off a much better vibe.

        It’s a shame that the space these men find themselves is pushing against freedom of expression for others.

        • exasperation@lemm.ee
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          I think it depends on a lot of real-life interactions, too. I had coaches and teachers and older work colleagues (including in heavily male dominated workforces, like the military) who were strong masculine role models. So when it came to media consumption I tended to gravitate towards celebrities or famous characters who already fit the worldview.

          Nick Offerman played a libertarian Ron Swanson on TV, but in that fictional work the core cultural markers of manhood were explicitly presented as non-political, and seem largely shared with the left-leaning actor himself.

          Terry Crews is similar, as you’ve pointed out. On Brooklyn 99 his character was presented as a loving father of young girls, who was in connection with his feelings, but also loved working out and sports and, you know, was a cop with a gun. In real life, in interviews, he seemed very much in tune with healthy masculinity and his place in the world.

          Steve Kerr and Greg Popovich give off positive male leader vibes and often speak up about political and cultural issues, while largely being protective and supportive of the younger men who essentially work for them.

          George Clooney is funny because he came off as a bit of a womanizer for years, but dove right into his long term relationship with a woman whose own career would arguably overshadow his. He is unabashedly and vocally a supporter of Democrats and other causes associated with the left in the United States.

          Nobody is perfect, or deserves to be put on a pedestal. But there are little nuggets of positive examples all around us, including traditionally masculine men who support ideals that are more culturally and politically associated with the cultural left.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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            George Clooney is funny because he came off as a bit of a womanizer for years, but dove right into his long term relationship with a woman whose own career would arguably overshadow his.

            George C- oh, you mean Amal Clooney’s husband. He’s some sort of actor, right? Anyway, Amal Clooney is awesome and a hero.

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      Thanks for relating all that - lots of information but worth the read. You largely summed up my own early existence in the first few paragraphs. My therapy came in the form of getting involved in theatre, which exposed me to all kinds of people and ideas, revamped my attitudes and saved me from embracing radical ideas that are more or less based on rejecting a society that rejects you. I think that same cynicism is common in people from many different backgrounds, who share the same alienation for all kinds of reasons.

      I’ll even add one - throughout my software career doing contract jobs, finding a new gig always took me 2-3 weeks and was very routine. When I turned 50 the 2-3 weeks abruptly and permanently became 2-3 months, and took a lot more effort. Apparently in that community I was suddenly too old. Only one recruiter let slip that age was the reason a potential client rejected me, but the sudden difference at 50 was stark. So I don’t know what you do for a living but you might be facing that yourself when it’s your time.

      Anyway I totally agree about empathy. I don’t know what it is but people seem to be constantly on guard nowadays. Their go-to assumption is to look for evil and refuse to accept simple mistakes. That and permanently crucifying anybody who does anything morally unacceptable, or ever did in their past. If somebody Likes the wrong tweet it’s unforgivable and irredeemable. I don’t recall another time when so many people were so militant about this attitude. Forgiveness used to mean compassion, now it means you’re complicit, enabling, a shill, “just as bad,” etc. I think we need to think of the glass houses analogy and stop pretending to be morally impeccable.

    • el_eh_chase@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      That was a very thoughtfully written response. I can relate to a lot of your story and agree with your conclusions. There needs to be more outlets for men as an alternative to right wing communities. I hope you meet more liberals and feminists that are open-minded to men’s hardships. I have to believe there are more reasonable people out there on the left than not.

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        I have to believe there are more reasonable people out there on the left than not

        There are, but online is where the psychopathic man haters feel free to let their colors fly. At union conventions and community meets, I only ever hear tame comments from the very obvious radfems.

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      there is no alternative to far-right echo chambers for young men to commiserate and get help

      I feel like there’s an adjacent issue where any space like that without a clear political lean quickly gets pushed rightwards by shitters

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        ugh I remember my last straw on Facebook was my high school alumni group becoming a shit-storm of sea-lioning and a couple folks blocking people and also spamming nostalgia-posts to drown out and push down more serious discussion. A high school famous for it’s science-focus but alas, the older (but not much older) folks were openly commenting about that black-people-crime-percentage “statistic” and gay people.

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      half joke first. nobody’s trying to meddle in our bodily autonomy, yet.

      edit: i havent looked too close at it but the mensliberation space on lemmy.ca may interest you? cancermancer down bellow has a rec for r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates that looks to have another good perspective in the topic. so im sticking it right here with the other.

      I’ll try to approach the topic from my perspective as well. my gender has never really be part of my internal view of myself. but it is an inescapable part of how other people will see me, and the rules are always whatever the other person wants. so maybe not the poster child for speaking on masculinity. i’m literally the default charater generator in every videogame, but it’s just a hallucinating meat suit.

      talking about gender concepts and social roles was a norm growing up because i did that growing up in the weird outside groups the christian kids chased. any reference to maculinity was done at me as an attack, even when i was doing it according to the rules. i agree, there are few places for young men to explore their way out of those strict views. especially in the early years. i’ve often seen them jump straight into spaces meant to be safe for people who’ve had not great experiances with the topic, especially women. and press other people to do all the work, explain things to them and navigate their often* harsh language. and i get it. when you’ve only ever been allowed to express 3 levels of the same emotion, it’s gonna be rough sorting that out.

      it’s going to be on people who have worked their way through that mind set to make those places for kids to start the process. most importantly, people who share their experiance and perspective. yes folls like me can and really need to come in there and talk openly. but my own experiance is never going to line up in a way that will connect with those kids. even when i look exactly like our experiance should line up.

      …if theres more spelling mistakes then there are more spelling mistakes. fuck it thats too much text for a phone

        • nzeayn@lemmy.world
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          fair point. sounds like theres a need for a space to have these conversations. with people effected by the topic and moded by people on the otherside of the joirney, who could have empathy in the difficult moments. anyone know of a space? i’ll try engaging where i can.

        • flashgnash@lemm.ee
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          Have also heard people talking about giving men vasectomies at 16 (people who don’t understand they can’t actually be undone)

          • octopus_ink@lemmy.ml
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            FWIW I’ve only seen that used to illustrate how ridiculous it is that we find it essentially normal to have laws controlling what women can do with their reproductive systems but not men. I’ve not seen a single credible example of someone seriously suggesting this.

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                I mean, yes, I’m sure there are people who do. There are people who think the earth is flat. They don’t influence policy though.

                Edit - my point is, no one is coming for your testes, and knowing someone who thinks it’s a good idea is no better an example here than it would be for me to say I’m worried a flat earther is going to influence space exploration policy.

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        mensliberation space on lemmy.ca

        I appreciate your otherwise quality comment but I have to say that I don’t intend to use a space that only views men’s issues through a feminist lens.

        On Reddit, LeftWingMaleAdvocates is a solid lefty men’s space.

        • nzeayn@lemmy.world
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          i spent all of a minute poking around. not a topic i deep dive in really. more hoping to pose the question of “hey do we maybe have a space like this?”. someplace where people having a shared perspective would have the patience for eachothers early questions they once had.

          i’m not on reddit but a few minutes poking around there it doesn’t look crazypants. so i’ll add it to my comment too.

          • CancerMancer@sh.itjust.works
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            No that’s fair, I don’t want you to feel like I’m saying you’re acting in bad faith because I absolutely do not believe that.

            • nzeayn@lemmy.world
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              nah i get it, i assumed good faith on your part as well. i skimmed through some threads in that sub and all i wanted to do was start jumping saying “guys just pause a second so we can talk about some of this language”. but thats absolutely not the place for me to do that.

              it would be as productive as the guys who’d go into r/twoxchromosomes posting “explain like i’m 5 why my wife left over not doing the dishes enough”. assumimg good faith, i get he’s thinking “ok this is where other women who have done this talk, i’ll ask them”. there wasnt anyplace else to send the dude, so a few people would try responding. but it always devolved into language policing, because not doing so in that space would forfit the sub to the people it was designed to be safe from. i never commented in that space specifically because it was their sub and i was just there to understand perspectives. i was a guest in their home.

              people need to be able to use the only words they know with the meaning they understand them to have. before they can do any self reflection or understand why it becomes important to adjust our language for eachother sometimes.

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      I have to imagine if the democrats had not largely ignored these problems they would’ve won by a landslide

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    It seems counter intuitive but I don’t think Gen Z is as good with technology as most people assume they are.

    I think they just believe everything they see on YouTube and TikTok. Those algorithms just feed people what they want to see and don’t challenge anyone.

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
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      Who thinks they’re good with technology? They’ve never had technology that requires any more knowledge than how to swipe. They’re shit with technology.

      • w3dd1e@lemm.ee
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        I mean that many people just assume younger generations are better with technology.

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            It’s absolutely a belief and it used to be true. For millennials especially it was true. We grew up with technology around us, but they required effort from the user to make them work. These created a lot of self-learned resourceful technologically literate people.

            Modern technology almost all wants to prevent you from messing with them. They function out of the box and limit your ability to modify them. This has created a lot of people who can’t understand how technology works beyond the user interface. They’re great at using a touch-screen, but they don’t understand what the device is doing beyond that.

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              Millennials aren’t zoomers though. The original statement was specifically about zoomers, and idk anyone who thinks they’re good with technology, and from what I’ve seen, they are not.

              Gen X and older millennials are the only generation who knows stuff on average. We had to teach our parents, and then we had to teach our kids (who don’t care to learn). We’re sandwich meat!

              • Cethin@lemmy.zip
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                That’s why I worded it the way I did. There’s still a sentiment that younger people should be better with technology, since they’ve interacted with it their whole life also. Their interaction was much different than ours though.

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            I personally don’t, but it’s a sentiment I hear around me from time to time in the workplace or on TV.

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              That’s been a common and roughly true trope for a long time, but I think we may have hit the point where high technology has been ubiquitous for multiple generations now and it’s probably not quite as true as it once was (that the younger generation is always better with technology than the previous)

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        Who thinks they’re good with technology?

        Millennials, it’s the only thing we’re good at, we suck at everything else…

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              Apparently millennials prefer paper towels over napkins and it’s affecting the napkin industry.

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                “tissues” vs “kitchen rolls” for anyone wondering what a paper towel is compared to a napkin.

                I gotta say, I always found tissues just sub-par for the job. A kitchen roll (towel? sleeve? paper?) you just need to fold it once and it will hold against a storm

                • Mr_Blott@feddit.uk
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                  Ok, the first article says “Millennials killed the paper napkin industry” then says they’re using paper towels instead

                  WTF is the difference between a paper napkin and a paper towel? I thought they were the same thing? 😂

                • GHiLA@sh.itjust.works
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                  I’m not, tho. 😎

                  Have a discussion with me about napkins. This is a social website.

    • merc@sh.itjust.works
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      Yep. Older people (Millennial, Gen X) grew up with PCs that could be heavily modified, run any program, even repurposed to run Linux if you were brave. Later generations who grew up with phones only get to use the apps that Apple / Google approve of. There’s no hacking the system, so you get whatever the algorithm says you get.

      Older people grew up on BBSes and later “Bulletin Boards”, which were mostly the same thing just with prettier graphics, also with email, and sometimes instant messengers. Communities were smaller, and there was no mediator. Younger ones are stuck in apps that are designed around engagement, with a “celebrity” vs “fan” content model where it’s all geared around followers and likes. It’s all parasocial relationships from the “fan” side, and trying to keep up with whatever the algorithm wants from the creator side.

      • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
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        It really fucking sucks that platforms that used to be designed to allow 2-way communication between equals have flopped so hard trying to follow the exact model you just outlined. For all its faults, Facebook used to be a really great place to keep in contact with long distance friends and family. Now it won’t even show you anything anyone in your friends list posts, and the options for interacting are completely neutered on their mobile site. It went from being a site I enjoyed, to a site I despise. And there aren’t any alternatives. The era of a platform for friends and family is over.

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          The only reason Facebook was at all successful is that they made it easy to migrate over from MySpace.

          Before Facebook people weren’t locked into their social networks. In the early days of BBSes you were mostly on your local BBS, but you could sometimes communicate with another BBS if your BBS was part of FidoNet. When instant messengers like ICQ, AIM, MSN Messenger, etc. became popular, it was common to use a unified program that logged into all of them at once. But, already there was corporate consolidation. BBSes were often run by people out of their own homes, or at least by hobbyists. The early messengers were all commercial products.

          Then there were the early social media websites: SixDegrees.com, Classmates.com, Friendster, (LinkedIn), MySpace, Orkut, and in 2004 Facebook. At first Facebook was closed to anybody who wasn’t a US university student. You even had to have an email address from a US university to register. But, when they wanted to grow, they made it easy to migrate from other sites, especially MySpace. They released a tool that allowed you to basically stay in touch with your MySpace friends from Facebook, but not the other way around. That slowly drained people away from MySpace until it eventually collapsed. These days, thanks to section 1201 of the DMCA, if you tried to release a tool that allowed people to migrate away from Facebook, you’d be nuked from orbit.

          Now, every social media site is a walled garden protected by a moat and an electric fence. Every one is owned by companies worth more than $1b. People can’t leave because the FOMO is too strong, but they don’t want to stay because the sites are pure shit. You see that especially with Twitter. It is absolute shit since Musk took over, but many people feel like they can’t leave. And, when people do leave, do they go to Mastodon, which isn’t owned by a corporation? Nope, they mostly go to Threads, owned by Meta, or Bluesky, owned by a lot of the same people behind Twitter.

          Unless the governments of the world step in and either break up the tech giants, or require that they are interoperable, I don’t know how we back out of this shitty situation.

          • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
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            I lived through those early days, and although they were glorious, those boards, and forums, and ICQ chats weren’t filled with friends and family.

            MySpace was the first place where everyone was. It was the first time in history where you could go find out what happened to all of your old friends and rekindle a relationship if you wanted to.

            I remember going through basic training when the Drill Sergeants told us we’d make the best friends of our lives, that we’d never see again. And that held true for 10 years after I got out. Then suddenly MySpace became hugely popular and I found them all again! Because of Facebook I’m still friends with several of them today.

            Facebook got really lucky with the timing of their public launch. They still kind of just sat around being empty until MySpace started massively changing the platform under new ownership from NewsCorp. I think that acquisition was the worst in history up until Twitter.

            Anyways, in their infinite corporate wisdom, they wiped everyone’s profiles. Like seriously, WTF? They deleted everyone’s pictures, all of their blog posts, comments, and just about everything. Talk about not understanding what they bought. They did release a tool to get your pictures back, but why the heck would anyone trust the site after that. People were already checking out Facebook, so they all just jumped over there. Plus the clean design, with lots of white space (which is completely gone now), was very Web 2.0 and people liked it.

            Anyways, like I originally said, and like you confirmed, that era is over. We both know the government is never going to split them up, and even an exact clone of a service today would fail. Social sites need people to succeed, and people don’t have any interest in creating a new community when there’s all of these ready-made communities that they already understand, regardless of how bad they have become.

            The only reason TikTok succeeded is because it had backing from CCP and basically infinite money to market and attract new people. No start-up would ever have those types of funds these days. If somehow through a miracle a start-up did acquire enough funding to be a threat to meta or Xitter, then the billionaires at the heads would make an irresistible offer, buy it, and kill it. It’s over. The free Internet is dead.

            • merc@sh.itjust.works
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              We both know the government is never going to split them up

              The American government isn’t going to. But, I do hold out hope for the EU. The EU already doesn’t like the US tech giants, and they’re much more driven by lobbying by European-based businesses, almost none of them on good terms with the US tech giants.

              We’ve already seen what effect the GDPR had on the web, and it affects Americans even if the law doesn’t apply in the US. We’ve seen how Apple has had to design all its devices to use USB-C because of new EU rules. I think it’s pretty reasonable to expect that the EU might require Mastodon-type rules for social networks, that you can leave to an instance that communicates with your old one, and that your followers and followees change when you move. Facebook would hate it, but Google (whose social network efforts all failed) wouldn’t really be affected, so they might push for it just to spite Facebook. Some of the other big American tech companies might actually like it. Like, Netflix might like to be able to graft a social network onto their video watching platform so that people could watch and talk about videos together.

              With the Biden administration going out and Trump going in, I think the FTC is going to go back to being a corporate cheerleader, but I still have some hope for the EU.

    • bitchkat@lemmy.world
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      My son is in his early 30s and hardly a day goes by that I don’t have to help him with a software issue.

      I don’t know if he’ll even be able to keep the media server running when I die. Probably won’t be for about 20 years so we’ll see.

  • Ragdoll X@lemmy.world
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    I was actually wondering how the gender gap changed in this election, and it wasn’t at all what I was expecting:

    According to exit polls by CNN Trump gained +2% of the male vote, and +5% of the female vote compared to 2020 - though women were still more likely to support Harris, of course.

    An analysis by the AP found similar results, with the support from men under 45 increasing +7%, and women under 45 +6%, while for older men it decreased -1%, and for older women stayed the same.

    Surprisingly, Trump’s support among racial minority groups increased while white and older Americans increased support for Harris.

    After thorough analysis and much thought I have ultimately concluded that I have absolutely no fucking clue what is going on with American politics.

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      It’s the economy. Look at the numbers for voters without a college degree, rural voters, and lower income voters. Trump won all of these groups. In the WaPo exit polls the issues are included, not just the demographics. For voters who think the economy is the most importantly issue and for voters who think the US economy is doing badly: Trump dominated.

      The Democrats continue to fail at shedding their reputation for being out of touch with working class Americans. The only income bracket that Harris won was the $100,000+ group. This tells us that the Democrats are an upper middle class and upper class party.

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          They probably feel like they’re fucked either way and have nothing going for them. That makes it easier to side with the dude spouting hate. If I was that age I’d probably be in the same boat as them because being angry and hateful feels good and it took me a while to get that under control. I certainly didn’t have any actual hope things would improve after this election but I did vote for Kamala because she at least wasn’t spouting hateful shit. Not that it helped because I live in a dark red district. If there hadn’t been an abortion amendment on the ballot I’d have probably skipped this one.

      • AA5B@lemmy.world
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        Wow, that’s crazy.

        I wonder how much of that is demonization of unions. If a big piece of Democrat support for working class is support for unions, does that actually matter when so many people of all incomes are taught to hate unions?

        Then there’s the student loan fiasco. By all rights the Biden administration should have gotten kudos for finding so many ways to attempt student loan forgiveness, and for focusing it on lower income people (for example, people in income based repayment with less than $10k left). However the right succeeded in making that seem elitist or not independent and the left seemed to blame Democrats for not being more successful in the face of Republican obstruction

    • thedirtyknapkin@lemmy.world
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      the real metric that matters is that way way less people voted. not many people changed their votes from last time. many people are simply convinced to stay home, and as always, that results in a Republican win. the propaganda that was most effective was all of the “Kamala is no true Scotsman, so you should just not vote”. i believe this was lost by the people that “refused to vote for genocide”. i think that’s what accelerated the genocide.

      • skibidi@lemmy.world
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        I really doubt double-digit millions of voters sat out because of Gaza.

        Kamala’s vote total is roughly in line with what would be expected looking at 2008, 2012, and 2016. The massive turnout in 2020 on the Dem side appears to be an abberation - it was unique circumstances with COVID and all that. On the Republican side, Trump ran slightly ahead of his 2020 performance, and well ahead of 2016.

        It’s basic electoral politics: Trump has succeeded at expanding his base of support and turning them out to vote reliably. The Democrats have not. No single issue is responsible for that.

        You can blame protests or Gaza or third parties or whoever else you want - the truth remains that the Dem base from the Obama years is not large enough and not appropriately distributed to win an election against Trump’s base; whatever else you think of the man, he has been very good at gaining and retaining support.

          • skibidi@lemmy.world
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            2020 was different from 2024. It was a very unique set of circumstances with an election in the middle of pandemic, with an incumbent who was never broadly popular, amidst utterly terrible economic conditions.

            Still, Trump’s base showed up, just as they did on Tuesday.

            Biden had the benefit of all the unlikely voters not being able to ignore the country burning down around them, he got a lot of dissatisfied people who don’t pay attention to politics to come out.

            Harris didn’t, she got the Dem base. People broadly dissatisfied at the state of things probably voted Trump since he isn’t the incumbent.

            Just how it works - voters don’t have to be rational.

      • Madison420@lemmy.world
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        True but I think that’s probably more of deep red state residents seeing their vote not matter live on TV every fucking election. I’ve seen the federal turnout but I haven’t compared state to state turnout yet and I would imagine that’s probably a better metric since like 30% of the population live where their vote makes no difference.

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      After thorough analysis and much thought I have ultimately concluded that I have absolutely no fucking clue what is going

      The statements above seem to suggest it’s no longer about identity politics. The habitual way of labeling people no longer explains political results.

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      Yep, Trump’s popularity went down with white voters (albeit only 2-4 points depending on male or female) but gained ground in Latino and “other unidentified” minorities. He also actually lost older voters too.

      But I think the biggest surprise for me is that Trump gained more of the new voters than Harris. And while I don’t have a gender breakdown from that, I wonder if a lot of those were males.

      • LANIK2000@lemmy.world
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        The guy that can’t shut the fuck up about eliminating minorities, got minority votes? If America is that suicidal, why can’t they just take a collective bullet? Would save the rest of the world a lot od trouble…

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      Harris just offered little to get voters excited. Mostly ran as a status-quo candidate. Racial minorities, for the most part, are not happy with the status-quo. By being ignored, it allowed right-wing propaganda on media (social and traditional) to do its work. One thing I’ve heard is, “well, at least Trump sent me some checks.” Many people I’ve talked to weren’t happy with Biden’s involvement with the crime bill, or Harris’ being a DA that proudly prosecuted cannabis offenders. Some people I’ve talked to liked that Trump pardoned Lil Wayne, Kodak Black, and that woman who had an extremely long sentence for cannabis. One person I’ve talked to was upset about “libtards” removing black faces from grocery store products (using Aunt Jemima as an example). Some younger men I know (some racial minorities) have started going deep into the Jordan Peterson, Fresh and Fit, Andrew Tate, etc pipeline, which I’m guessing is rooted in sexual insecurity.

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      So many pundits were leaning into the gender gap so hard, I really expected a blowout landslide for Harris. This is the last time I pay any attention to commentators, forecasters or polls. My current theory of American politics is that we’ve become a full-on Idiocracy. There are always idiots in any society, but I really feel like if we can elect the Orange Sack of Shit a second time, our collective stupidity has passed a tipping point. We almost made it to 250 years too. But nothing lasts forever. Hang onto your seat, I don’t expect swirling down the drain to be fun.

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        Some commentators were even publishing absolutely ridiculous cope to explain why the polls were 50/50. The media was working overtime to stick their heads in the sand for some reason.

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          I think corporate media wants every race to be neck-and-neck because that gets more ad views. I put the results of this election to Trump’s stunning con man ability (his only real ability) and to millions of Americans being fucking idiots.

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    As a zoomer that’s old enough to be working class now. Man, my childhood was fucked. At school, being a right wing troll was the norm, at least for boys. I was too.

    The worst part is no-one cared, fucking “they’ll grow out of it” and now everyone is suddenly in shock. When I talk about it to my friend today he’s even in fucking denial about it, “Oh they didn’t actually mean that, it was all jokes”.

    And our education system doesn’t do anything to combat this shit either. Quite the opposite, the dogmatic authoritarian approach schools take coupled with zero-tolerance policies pretty much ensures people shouting this hateful shit get away with it.

    After all saying “Hitler did nothing wrong” only gets annoyed looks, gets completely brushed off as “edgy” or something. But then when someone points out that person’s shit, suddenly that’s an attack???

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      I graduated from a Christian high school a few years ago, and now they have a Discord server that’s basically their own version of 4chan and they post a bunch of edgy racist/queerphobic/etc stuff. Then the person running it went to MIT. It still exists and I’m pretty sure the staff knows about it and doesn’t give a shit. Of course the school itself promotes racist and queerphobic political ideologies as well so that’s not exactly helpful either.

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        A lot of this are encouraged under the table. Any plans on it is usually talked rather than texed, so there will be less chance of it that it could surface, and is between the most trustworthy people.

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      “Oh they didn’t actually mean that, it was all jokes”.

      Because those were jokes.

      The problem we have today is not that it was socially acceptable to be a psychopath online in 2014. The problems are, in my opinion:

      • Rapidly decreasing standards of living
      • Social media making people more stupid
      • Governments being too large and intransparent
      • Pointless governmental spending without explaining the why to the population

      The right-wing shift is part of a global failure of established governments.

      • rottingleaf@lemmy.world
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        The right-wing shift is part of a global failure of established governments.

        Yes! Thank you.

        Just as the next left-wing shift won’t be a result of humanity getting smarter somehow, it will be a result of right-wing policies failing. And that shift won’t lead to any improvement either.

        It’s a pendulum.

        People are willing to tolerate a failing system longer, when it aligns on surface with their own views. This is similar to people on the right defending Pinochet and death squadrons.

        And people on the left 20 years ago would defend a lot of things about USSR or Che Gevara or stuff like this, even not being tankies.

        Tribalism leads to degeneracy.

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      The worst part is no-one cared, fucking “they’ll grow out of it” and now everyone is suddenly in shock. When I talk about it to my friend today he’s even in fucking denial about it, “Oh they didn’t actually mean that, it was all jokes”.

      Most edgy teens do grow out of it. I roll my eyes at embarrassment at some of the stuff I wrote in college, and high school me was even stupider.

      But one difference in my high school years (in the 90’s), edginess wasn’t inherently politically coded. Some of it was racist, sexist, or homophobic, but plenty of the targets were also Republican constituencies: rural/small town people, Christians, fat people, old people, prudes, etc. In a conservative suburban area, jokes about abortion, sex, drugs, etc. were often designed to elicit shock and disgust.

      I think we’ve seen a cultural shift in which edginess is seen as right wing in itself, in part because the right, which used to get offended at things like Harry Potter and Howard Stern and Disney movies, has fallen in line with edgy Gen X comedians who somehow didn’t grow out of it, and made room for people who smoke weed and mock the Bible.

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        in the 90s you attacked whatever was around cause you were a piece of shit, now you got the internet so pieces of shit worldwide can band together and hate a specific cause.

        • exasperation@lemm.ee
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          band together and hate a specific cause.

          The thing with Gen X teenage nihilism was that the only cardinal sin was actually having a strong opinion. There wasn’t much room to hate on anything, because actually hating something showed that you cared too much, and that wasn’t what we were about.

          Gen Z seems to be much more willing to embrace negative emotions and acknowledge that they care enough to hate. Whether that’s a better or a worse thing, I’m not sure.

        • bitjunkie@lemmy.world
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          We had the internet in the 90s. It just wasn’t in every 12-year-old’s pocket all day, and the nefarious smoky room types were too old to understand how it worked, let alone carry our mass manipulation campaigns with it as the medium.

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      I begged my admin to do something about my boy students sexually harassing my girl students. Instead, my some of my boy students discovered I was trans and outed me.

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      A lot of millennials were pro war back in 2001+ a bunch of people I went to school with joined the military. People would say “support our troops!” When you criticized the wars. This is nothing new, just brainwashing.

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      I have seen teachers say that hitler was right, that walls were invented by aliens and that giants existed and were romanian

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        giants existed and were romanian

        Wait, what? I didn’t see any giants in my high school. Are they invisible giants or something?

        Also, where were those giants during the 2nd Dacian war? Romans must have been superheroes or something to take on giants and win.

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      The result of telling women they could vote for someone their husband didn’t vote for was the right flipping out and essentially calling them property. How likely do you think speaking up is when you are stuck financially to someone who sees you as a servant rather than a person?

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        We went from voting privately to “speaking up”. Why?

        What was keeping them from voting for Harris besides their own shitty views?

        • Madison420@lemmy.world
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          Nothing, lots of people just didn’t know they could.

          We found out tons of people just don’t keep up regardless of party, where to vote for Biden shouldn’t have been so popular but it was and is kinda sad.

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        Lmao, ‘it was the husband’s fault’, good one.

        Seems to me a little belittling to not attribute responsibility to women when shit hits the fan.

        • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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          Let me guess, the “responsibility” we have to take is to “double down on moving to the right”.

          • Murvel@lemm.ee
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            No, I’m talking about the responsibility of voting

      • Makhno@lemmy.world
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        Lmao so women have no agency?

        Fucking spare me. You’re a miserable sap that can’t stop slinging shit/blame 😂

        • Madison420@lemmy.world
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          They have it all they want, I’m going to guess a lot just don’t want to deal with a pissed off significant other. Would you?

          Calm down and make some limited amount of sense and try to make a point.

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          The Exit Polls that were a verbal conversation upon leaving might not be accurate if they are asking women in front of their partners, right?

          I’m not USian, so IDK how those polls work. I’m just dismayed that that many women would vote for a pedo rapist who took away their bodily autonomy.

        • leadore@lemmy.world
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          According to your link it looks like it was the other way around, women were 53% Harris and 45% trump. Assuming that’s what the blue and red bars mean.

          • exasperation@lemm.ee
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            They’re talking about specifically white women, not all women, which the link (and exit polling from other major sources) also reports had a 53% vote for Trump.

            • leadore@lemmy.world
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              Ah, I see. Thanks, I just needed to scroll down a little.

              A lot of those white women are Christian evangelicals salivating to install the Christian Theocracy. It’s sad & infuriating. I’m seeing clips of interviews with swing staters of various demographics who voted for him. They’re all like, “It’s gonna be great, the stock market’s gonna go up 40%, gas prices will go down by half! All those ads about him doing bad things are lies.”

        • RBWells@lemmy.world
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          Fair enough. I just talk to a lot of women, all are aghast no matter their race. Men are less so, though many are disappointed, they are more blase.

    • _____@lemm.ee
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      in the age of misinformation and grifting mind you. it’s not just the technology, we’ve had youtube for 20 years

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    I can see why some young men might feel like the Democratic party is prioritizing women’s issues over those affecting men, especially young men. In fact, it might seem like the Democratic party is not only indifferent to struggling young men, but hostile to them. I can understand why someone might not want to vote for a party that thinks of them as deplorable, pathetic losers.

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      Issues affecting young women:

      1. Rapes aren’t prosecuted
      2. Government forced births
      3. Bleeding out in a parking lot
      4. Widespread misogyny

      Issues affecting young men:

      1. Girls won’t put out
      2. There aren’t enough pickup trucks
      3. Joe Rogan is being victimized by jews
      4. Germ theory and masks or something

      How exactly can a political party address what is for men essentially a collection of toxic culture issues?

      • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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        Issues affecting young men:

        1. Rape reports are ignored and not taken seriously
        2. Not trained in the tools to deal with mental health and emotions
        3. High expectation to make money but low job prospects
        4. Jerks trivializing the fact that men have real concerns because OtHeRs HaVe It WoRsE.

        It should be empathy for all. Asshat.

        • sigmaklimgrindset@sopuli.xyzOP
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          Your list is the issues that men are actually facing, but what OP posted is what the clout chasing “alpha influencers” tout as “men’s actual problems”.

          For everyone’s sake, we need to start reclaiming men’s spaces from these Andrew Taint-wannabe’s, and towards people like you. They don’t care about anything but their bank accounts.

          • chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world
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            Influencers are the tail that thinks they’re wagging the dog. When they aren’t shilling garbage products and cryptoscams they’re spending all their time trying to find the next trend to chase. Besides the shilling, at their worst they’re merely a sounding board for ideas and issues that are already out there (and have been for a long time).

            The biggest mistake the Democrat campaign made was to ignore the plight of working class, non-college educated people. To a group that’s been reeling from inflation and the major setback of COVID lockdowns, the Democrats promised more of the same. That’s not good enough! What good is student loan forgiveness to people who never went to college?

            That’s been the problem for the Democrats for decades now. A party that used to call labour unions its base now focuses pretty much exclusively on college-educated middle class and up.

            I just had a look at the exit polls. Of the people who said the economy was the most important use, 79% voted for Trump. Of those who think the US’s economy is doing not so good/poor (67% of voters), 69% voted for Trump.

            I know lots of people here will sneer at that and Trump seems pretty unlikely to right the ship but he actually promised change whereas the Democrats did not. Promising to keep things the same when 2/3 of voters believe the economy is poor is not going to get the job done.

            • M0oP0o@mander.xyz
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              Yeah, and people seem to forget a key question these days: “what middle class?”

          • KoboldCoterie@pawb.social
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            Empathy isn’t a zero sum game. It is, in fact, possible to care about women’s issues and men’s issues at the same time. A woman getting the support they need doesn’t take anything away from a man, nor does a man getting the support they need take anything away from a woman.

            • Soup@lemmy.world
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              And yet these “all ____ matter” comments only come up when someone tries to take the spotlight away from white men. Women getting the support they need has been fought tooth and nail by men for fucking ages. The group that only just got the ability to have their own bank account doesn’t owe us fuck all in politeness especially when so many of us act like goddamn degenerates all the fucking time. They still struggle to even get healthcare that isn’t designed for men.

              What you’ve got in your comment is a deflection away from the real use of these things. It’s not clever, you’re just being an ass.

              • Yucky_Dimension@lemmy.world
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                The original topic was about the radicalisation of men. One poster commented how it might feel that the democratic party doesn’t care about men’s issues. Another replied and tried to trivialize those issues. So some users advocate for empathy. And you reply with “but what about women?” Do women face issues? Absolutely. Arguably more than men, I don’t know. But that’s beside the point here. The topic was radicalisation of men, and a possible cause. I would argue, you’re acting like an ass right now.

                • Soup@lemmy.world
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                  And I’m pointing out that men have not been forgotten, they’re just whining because it’s not about them 100% of the time anymore and they need to get over themselves. Also, their sexism caused a lot of the problems that women face and are now having to do all this fucking work to fix.

                  Boo-fucking-hoo.

          • lemonmelon@lemmy.world
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            I don’t know the solution, but I do know that self-hatred isn’t it.

            People face a myriad of assaults on their mental health every day. Virtue signaling and choosing to leave any subgroup behind just because you think someone else has it worse won’t lead to the outcome you hope it will.

            • Soup@lemmy.world
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              Men aren’t being left behind, they’re just a bunch of fucking babies about maybe actually having to police their own behaviour. Women have been carrying the mental load for generations and now that we’re being asked to carry our fair share we do this shit.

              You’re not being left behind, you’re just being a asshole.

              Also, I’m a tall straight white male. Blond hair and blue eyes and everything. I don’t feel the least bit left behind. I feel embarrassed that I may have acted a certain way in the past, and it’s hard to overcome habits and normalized shitty behaviours. Instead of running from it and blaming everyone else for pointing out how my behaviour might have hurt someone I’m dealing with it and trying to be better.

              • lemonmelon@lemmy.world
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                I don’t give a fuck who you are. I didn’t ask, and it’s not relevant. And whatever you’re doing smacks more of “look how much better I am than you” than “I’m truly trying to be a better person.”

                Empathy makes you better, not self-hate and virtue signaling. People need help. All of them.

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                  The bar is pretty low, it’s pretty easy to be a better person.

                  Also this isn’t “self-hate”. It’s called introspection you spineless little weasel. Maybe you should hate yourself a little, kickstart a little humility in there.

        • Incandemon@lemmy.ca
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          Its disingenuous to the actual issues facing young men, but right on point for how people seem to see mens issues. It is in fact a perfect example of why men might just feel put upon by the left.

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            Nowhere in this thread has anyone discussed issues that exclusively affect men. There are very few such issues and all of them are trivial.

      • TheDemonBuer@lemmy.world
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        How exactly can a political party address what is for men essentially a collection of toxic culture issues?

        I don’t necessarily know, and neither does the Democratic party, which is at least part of the reason why Trump just got reelected.

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        Talk about diving people, what a prime example. What would you say if I name fashion as one of the primary female problems? Or having good pictures on Instagram?

        • thesohoriots@lemmy.world
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          It’s not so much a crucifix but a lowercase letter T for his low-testosterone he’s so obsessed with

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        Imagine if you reversed the roles there and said something like issues facing women: handbag not sparkly enough or some shit

        There are real issues for both men and women. The fact people think otherwise is part is the root of the problem

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          But I would be lying.

          Look, name an issue that exclusively affects men, and I’ll amend my list. So far, no one has come up with anything.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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            “Rapes aren’t prosecuted” doesn’t exclusively effect women by any means. Also, men can get pregnant. Trans men are men.

            I understand the point you’re making and I generally agree, but to suggest there are not issues that affect young men much more than young women that seriously need fixing is silly.

            The insane drug war affects men far, far more than women.

            And you’ll also notice that, aside from Breyonna Taylor who cops didn’t even know was there, virtually every major case involving police extrajudicial murder was of a black man.

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              “The drug war” is not a male-exclusive problem. That would be like saying that because men are responsible for perpetrating 99% of violent crime, violence is an exclusively male problem. Notice I didn’t say that.

              Also, are you sure you want me to add “trans male pregnancy” to the list of male problems? Are you quite sure this is something your fellow men feel strongly about? Don’t be dishonest, please.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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                Tell me you didn’t even look at the image without telling me you didn’t look at the image.

                And you also don’t seem to think men can be raped since you think it’s only rapes of women that don’t get prosecuted.

                Also, are you sure you want me to add “trans male pregnancy” to the list of male problems?

                I was pointing out the flaw in you claiming these were only problems that involve women. That is only true for most of them if you do not think trans men are men. Are trans men actually men?

          • flashgnash@lemm.ee
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            Mental health issues being ignored by their peers and society as a whole is a pretty big one

            You could claim women have mental health problems too and they do but they have spaces to talk about that

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              So your claim is that “mental health issues” are an exclusively male problem? Because again, the problems I listed for women affect them exclusively.

              So do you see what the problem is here?

              EDIT: people that downvote this benign comment are proving me right. Braindead.

              • flashgnash@lemm.ee
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                You ignored part of my message, I said the problem was that men’s mental health problems are largely ignored, not that women don’t have mental health problems

                • yeahiknow3@lemmings.world
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                  So to be clear, one of the main issues that men in this country face that women do not face is that “their mental health issues are ignored”?

                  Who is “ignoring” these mental health issues? There’s no systematic lack of access that needs to be legislated, correct? I had absolutely zero problem getting therapy as a man. It’s a toxic masculinity thing of men themselves being unwilling to see a therapist. Correct?

      • Squorlple@lemmy.world
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        I think many men, whether they realize it or not, feel specifically persecuted by trans rights. They might say that allowing trans women in women’s sports is cheating and that it would allow the trans women to be successful in the sport over less merit than they as cis males would have to. The deconstruction of the gender/sex binary also threatens cis males’ historic position as self-assigned protectors, leaders, and winners of the “weaker sex”. There is also the phobia among men of discovering that the woman whom they want to romance is trans, which really comes down to masculine fragility and conformity that leads to homophobia (in the sense of XY + XY, not gender) and transphobia. As a cis male, these men need to get over themselves.

        Many men also believe that gun control is a threat to them. They need these guns in case a fascist power ever seizes the government and they need to fight back, so they are actively voting for the fascist powers to seize the government so that they can keep their guns.

        There are also men who hold prejudice against any religion except Christianity so leftwing inclusivity efforts and anti-prejudice efforts come across as welcoming these perceived threats. These men aren’t simply just the redneck Bible thumpers or even devout or practicing Christians, but they just see the most common belief system around them as the default.

        It’s not that these issues are a threat to men, but that they perceive them as threats.

  • Soup@lemmy.world
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    Women asked for some basic goddamn respect and when they got “uppity”(because us men weren’t listening) they really got a “you were mean to me so I’m gunna elect Hitler again”. Millions of people alive today want women strip women of the rights they fought for and women are supposed to be polite about it?!

    It’s crazy how weak they are and I’m sad sharing a gender with them.

    • M0oP0o@mander.xyz
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      And many of those people who voted to “elect Hitler again” were woman. I think it is wild that people keep minimizing the role of the single largest voting demographic into victims.

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        I thought the Harris campaigns ads to encourage female voters in red counties was incredibly demeaning.

        “What happens at the polls stays at the polls”

        I’m male, but I cringed hard at those ads.

        I wonder if the had good reception at focus groups or something. Maybe it really did play well, I don’t know. But it made it seems like women were too weak to own their opinions or vote.

        • M0oP0o@mander.xyz
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          Yeahhhh, maybe treating voters like that was not a great idea. Also I got the impression if they felt safe about voting before, those ads made them reconsider.

      • Soup@lemmy.world
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        Which would forget the huge amounts of indoctrination that subset of that group has experienced, both religious and just cultural by way of hearing “it’s a woman’s place” for their entire lives. And just because they can be stupid, too, doesn’t mean they aren’t victims and just because they’re victims doesn’t mean they can’t be stupid.

        We’re all getting fucked by the right economically and it’s not even hidden a little but but they keep getting into power. It’s the same shit, different pile.

    • thedirtyknapkin@lemmy.world
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      the data does not support this conclusion. more young men did not vote for Trump, less people in total voted. almost no one changed their vote from last election. people were just convinced to stay home, which always results in Republican wins. both candidates got less votes total than last year, by a lot. i blame this on the “i refuse to vote for genocide” people that have just successfully accelerated that genocide.

    • flashgnash@lemm.ee
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      More like men don’t want to elect someone who actively and publicly tells them they’re the problem based on a minority that believe those things

      • Soup@lemmy.world
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        A not-insignificant number of men are the problem. Where are you seeing the democrats saying this so blatantly? I haven’t seen it yet and would love to know where it’s coming from.

  • kyub@discuss.tchncs.de
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    The main source of this recent trending fascism, anti-scientific thinking and so on is social media or the web in general. To resist or refute the mass of false information and find out what’s likely true and what’s not, requires education, literacy, media competency, things like that. I guess current generations are lacking this so they fall easy prey to “funny” fascist memes, fakes and rhetoric, then vote for rightwing extremists, destabilizing their own country as a result, not realizing that this leads to big disadvantages for everyone including themselves. We failed to protect these younger generations from misinformation, and now they are turning the world into what they are misled to believe is true.

    We used to have relatively high living standards in the Western democracies. This will soon all crumble and we (most people who aren’t rich) will suffer from it, regardless of who you voted for. And on top of that, climate change will finish us all off, because battling that isn’t even on the radar for those fascists because they don’t even believe in it. So instead of doing too little, we’ll do literally zero and even accelerate the problem, meaning it’ll affect us all much sooner already and with higher intensity.

    So enjoy your still existing relatively privileged life while it still lasts. It’s ging to get much, MUCH worse before it’s going to be better again. Buckle up and prepare yourselves.

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    Man. I get being disappointed. I really do get it.

    But tarring all these guys with “hitler youth” when just like every other group, at worst it’s a 45-55% split… Come on. That’s a hell of an insult to throw towards people, many of whom are doing their best and didn’t vote Trump. Doing your best, doing everything that you can do, and still being met with scorn… I know how bad that hurts. I know how it sucks the will right out of you. I know it drives people away. And even if it doesn’t drive them to Trump because they’re good people, it sure isn’t going to drive them towards finding a solution.

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      Don’t worry, the youth will only become further right-wing.

      Here’s the result of a local German state election from September. It displays the results for people aged 18-24, divided into male (light) and female (dark). AfD is openly fascist. No other age group voted for them as much. Getting 46% in a system with proportional representation is basically unheard of by the way.

      I very much suspect this trend will continue.

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        Doesn’t need to continue but probably will because as other people have mentioned the left pushes them away and the right welcomes them

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    I am Gen Z male and please do not let my blond hair, blue eyes, and German lineage deceive you. I’m as appalled as one can be with all of this. I never connected with my boomer dad or my millennial elder brothers over machismo or sports nor did I ever pick up TikTok and my social media consumption elsewhere was limited or gated by my own doing. From my experience, the pressure to conform to masculinity and male dominated in-groups; the perceived onus to keep males in power and powerful; and the propagandists’ weaponization of media such as TikTok, Facebook, podcasts, and Fox News and their ilk on TV and radio are the main depreciators of character in these cases.

    • iii@mander.xyz
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      Don’t apologize for the way you look. You didn’t choose that.

      • Squorlple@lemmy.world
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        I only mentioned those characteristics because of the Hitler Youth descriptor used in the screenshot and I wanted to underscore that there are strangers who don’t want to be seen as the enemy but the enemy has co-opted their innate look. I know not to judge a person’s character by their appearance and I hope those on this side of the situation all know that as well.

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        They could dye their hair…

        Clearly my attempt to joke fell flat, sorry for using comedy as a response to stress.

  • oyo@lemm.ee
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    Because the Republicans succeeded at fully killing education. It’s dead.

    • Stovetop@lemmy.world
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      8 days ago

      I am morbidly curious to see what happens over the next generation or two. The innate anti-intellectualism that seems to be a required component of right-wing policy will heavily affect red states, but blue states are still prioritizing their school systems. Is the “states’ rights” party going to sic the fed on state-controlled school systems in blue states to prevent the spread of thoughtcrime?

      If it’s only blue states that continue funding education, what does that do long-term in a nation that has shifted away from being a manufacturing superpower to now primarily making its capital on knowledge industries? It is already the case that college applicants from states like Massachusetts and Connecticut get inherent bonus points in their transcripts just by virtue of where they graduated high school, because earning an A in Boston means more than earning an A in Baton Rouge. We’ve got a brain drain of doctors and nurses, and teachers and college professors, all leaving red states because the laws there are getting too oppressive for them to work. Most of the finance and technology sectors remains in the (blue) northeast and west coast states as well.

      What is the long-term plan for the Republican party to empower their own constituents in these red-state strongholds when their old industries are gone, never to return, and they refuse to invest in the education and welfare of their citizens?

      • Rentlar@lemmy.ca
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        8 days ago

        My prediction is that we’re going to have plaques and monuments that say “In memory of 2026, thousands of American citizens deported - and its the Democrats fault btw”

        Any semblance of resistance will be labelled as “radical leftists trying to subvert the will of America”… with how over half of voters made their decision, the will of America seems far different than I remembered.

        • Stovetop@lemmy.world
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          8 days ago

          Take back your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Expel these, the homeless, tempest-tost to anywhere else, I laugh and lock our golden door!

          • Lemmyoutofhere@lemmings.world
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            8 days ago

            If Trump manages to succeed in his massive deportation, someone needs to make that plaque and weld it on top of the original.

  • GrymEdm@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    I’m not doubting you OP, just asking if anyone has the voter demographics data that shows Gen Z males voted for Trump because I’m interested in the #'s of the issue.

    As to the question of the post: I think part of the issue is that what it means to be a strong, mentally healthy male has been left unspecified or even attacked in recent years and that’s left a lot of young men confused and upset. Men get all sorts of advice on what’s wrong to do, but not enough on what’s right. Contradictory advice makes the confusion worse.

    Are you supposed to chase a girl or is that creepy? How do you navigate increased romantic isolation and dating apps in a healthy way? What are expectations about being the sole income provider a la tradition? In that vacuum confident, opinionated, clear voices are persuasive, and a lot of those voices are the jackasses pushing a toxic masculinity and telling males to reclaim it. We need more strong, positive male role models and visible social support of them if we want to win young men back - they have to know that being better will yield rewards.

      • GrymEdm@lemmy.world
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        8 days ago

        You are my hero :) Thank you for the link! You are right to say that number is probably significant. Given how vocal female support of Kamala was, it’s likely young men make up a lot of that shift too. Of course we’ll have to wait for more detailed stats to be sure, but it’s not unreasonable IMO.

        • sigmaklimgrindset@sopuli.xyzOP
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          8 days ago

          No worries, I love discussing numbers, and elections always give some great statistical insight, no matter where in the world it is.

          My solace today is being able to look at the numbers and intellectualize some of the outcomes. Otherwise I’d just be depressed all day :')

    • daniskarma@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      8 days ago

      Sometimes it feels like a man need to feel guilty just for being a man, even if they have done absolutely nothing wrong.

      I don’t know in America. Here in Spain there is a trend in which to be “feminist” somehow you have to admit that you are a little sexist, because are men are sexist even a little. It is an absolute. It’s not even “a majority of men…” its all, no other opinions accepted.

      And if you decline that premise, and just say “I’m not sexist, I treat everyone the same despite gender” you are somehow lying and trying to hide your sexism, which makes you a bad person or something.

      And I refuse that. I refuse to accept having done things that I have not done. Same I reject accepting responsibility for things I have not made or enabled. And some people still want me to accept that guilt.

      That trend needs to die. I know that it creates sorority making the “all of us vs all of them” rhetoric, but my humble believe is that that path do not lead to the desired destination.

      Edit: I was going to start the comment with “As a man” as it was my assigned at birth gender. But in all true and while for confort I just let most people treat me with masculine gender I just do not believe in gender as a social construct. Not that I do not believe as in I do not believe it exist, I do not believe that gender is a desirable social construct we need to keep in our society. But that’s just my opinion.

      • GrymEdm@lemmy.world
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        8 days ago

        I understand what you mean, and it sucks. I’ve been accused of being antisemitic because I post against Israeli policy and I’ve never cared about ethnicity or birthplace. Sometimes because I put up a post talking about supporting Jews that oppose Netanyahu’s Zionism. It doesn’t matter to some folks - if you have a problem with certain people it’s not because of what they do or say, it’s sexism, racism, etc.

        Here in Canada it’s not automatically assumed men are sexist. There are folks who will say that but they are a small group. I can only imagine it’s maddening to have to defend yourself constantly, especially if most people won’t believe you no matter what. It kind of reminds me of an old Dave Chappelle sketch (NSFW language) about being accused of sleeping with someone and having people assume it happened.

      • octopus_ink@lemmy.ml
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        8 days ago

        And if you decline that premise, and just say “I’m not sexist, I treat everyone the same despite gender” you are somehow lying and trying to hide your sexism, which makes you a bad person or something.

        We all have implicit biases, this is undeniable. Denying this doesn’t make you a bad person, but you are denying reality. Having the biases doesn’t make you a bad person either - again we all do. But you can’t be mindful of them if you deny they exist.

        • daniskarma@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          7 days ago

          As I said I reject that extremist premise.

          I declare it an extremist idea because is a “Black or white” “All or nothing” thing. We all need to have those biases so “some people” feel better about themselves, one way or the other.

          I do not have those biases. That’s just it. The only thing I deny is a false accusation made by people that does not know me.

          Because those people could came a say to me “see this behavior you had” that’s a little sexist. But not, they are unable to point such behavior, they just assume it must exist, because it’s part of their dogma.

          I’m totally ok to just being pointed at something I made wrong and willing to correct it. But point it first. Not just assume that wrong behavior exist just because of a dogma.

          And I also believe that accusing people of things they have not done just to fit a rhetoric is part of the cause of the disengagement of some collectives with the political mainstream left. Why would anyone would want to be near people that want humilliation, responsability and reparations for things one have just not done?

          • octopus_ink@lemmy.ml
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            7 days ago

            You are reading a lot into my comment about implicit biases that is literally just not there.

            Have a good day!